Alethea & Athena (double_dear) wrote,
Alethea & Athena

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We disappeared again today. We went over to Mom's place for Steve's birthday, as I said yesterday that we would. It was actually pretty nice for the most part, except for the two people who were very reluctant to do anything not getting in trouble, when one of them was one of the people who gets on our case for being poor sports. But really, other than that it was good. After Steve opened his presents, they decided to put in the DVD of classic commercials that he got so the adults could have a nostalgia trip, but they all got bored when the commercials they wanted to see didn't come up, so they decided to let those who wanted to play Scum, with the commercials on in the background.

Fortunately, by the time everyone else decided the commercials were too boring to take anymore, it was time for the women's fireside. We weren't planning to go, because we're bad and don't go to firesides and because we thought we'd still be doing stuff at Mom's place, but once we realized Mom and Sarah had both changed their minds and were going to go, we did not want to be left alone in with everybody else, so we went, too. And it turned out to be incredibly awesome, so we're very happy we went.

The speaker started out by saying that there are three ways to gain control of your life. The first one was to stop being a victim. She said (and this is pretty cliche, but the reason for that is that we all need to be reminded so often) your trials are only as big as you make them, and no matter what the trial, you define it, and it can be as big or as small as you want. She also talked about how you need to stop making excuses as to why you're the victim, because as long as you're a victim, you'll never progress.

The second thing was to have the way you are be in synch with what you believe. She told about how she was never insecure until she made freshman president in high school, and she and her friend were both talking in class, and her friend got in trouble but she didn't because she was the president. Then she realized that everything was based on her title, and she got really insecure. But later on, she realized that the smaller the gap is between who you are and what you believe, the less insecure you'll be.

The last thing was, of course, to always have the Holy Ghost with you, because it helps you see things the way they really are, like wearing goggles in a swimming pool (she teaches swimming lessons, so she used stuff relating to that a lot).

And she was an excellent speaker and very energetic and easy to pay attention to, so we generally felt better about life after the whole thing. Of course, I felt better about life for a few other reasons that are much more selfish, also. I had a confrontation with the Roommate last night, and her main point was that almost everything we say feels like an attack. This was a shock, because the first thing I thought of was that I think I talk about a lot of things like, for example, the weather, which are very neutral subjects and difficult to attack people on. I took this thought, and at the same time I somehow took what the Roommate said very seriously, and the idea that my words are so venomous as to sound like an attack even when I'm talking about the weather must mean that I'm a very mean, scary person.

But the more we thought about it, the more we realized that she was probably just saying that stuff to make herself right, and therefore it probably didn't have as much basis in reality as she was letting on. Though we know it had some basis in reality, because her supporting argument is that we always find the negative in things first, and we've gotten that from just about every member of our family. So we made a mental note to try to be more positive, but at the same time, it makes me feel smug when the Roommate complains about something, because it reassures me that she was just turning things around on us so as not to feel guilty herself. And she complained about something on the way home, so that, and having the Fantasmic! music in my head, had me very cheerful when we got home.

Things have cooled down a bit, but life's still good. Today I'm thankful for that totally awesome fireside, being re-called as the Relief Society pianist, having yummy things with which to raise our blood sugar, only getting bit once by Mom's cat, and relatively painless visits.
Tags: church, family stuff, life, roommate stuff

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