So naturally we played more Kingdom Hearts, and after all my excitement about how Arendelle might not be so bad after all, it turned out to be bad after all.
See, we got out of the ice labyrinth and went to find Elsa again, and we did! ...Right before she started singing Let It Go. Oh man, it was so annoying. I mean, it's not entirely unexpected, so I just kind of rolled my eyes and took advantage of the fact that now we could find out the Japanese lyrics. It occurred to me last night that it was possible that one of the things that makes me hate Frozen, i.e. certain lyrics to the songs, might not be a thing in the Japanese version, because translation is also a filter. So how did the Song That Shall Not Be Named (except it already was; I just didn't want to say it again) stack up?
Well, the theme is basically the same--I'm done keeping my emotions to myself, and now I'm going to be who I really am. But! the line that really bugged me (no right, no wrong, no rules for me) is nowhere to be found. Either it didn't fit, or the Japanese translators decided it wouldn't be great for a Japanese audience. Either way, I'm cool with it. What I'm not cool with is that the song is still a big fat hairy lie. She's all, "I'm happy to be myself! I'm not going to cry! I'm proud of who I am! And I'm different now!" And none of those things are actually true. (Athena says the one about not crying might be true.) In fact, in the Japanese version, she says she's not going to keep her feelings bottled up and not talk to people anymore, and I'm like, "...Which is why you've isolated yourself in the mountains to never speak to anybody again. Good thinking."
And her castle isn't even anywhere near as impressive as the ice labyrinth we just came out of. Larxene (who made the labyrinth) even said after she made it, "Ice magic's not even my thing, but oh well."
But now Sora and Pals are all touched by her beautiful deceptive power ballad, and they're like, "She's different now." And I'm like, "Sure, if you only look at physical appearance." In their defense, Athena points out that they didn't really know Elsa before--they only knew Angsty Elsa, and I Just Let It Go Elsa. You know, the one with the smug smirk (#DreamworksFace (we'd say "tm" at the end of that, but Toy Box reminded us that the face actually started with Buzz Lightyear (#PixarFace))) that evaporates as soon as they cut to another scene and never really comes back.
Still, Sora is determined to figure out what her deal is, so they were going to go talk to her, but Larxene stops them and says Elsa might be one of the New Seven Heart (that's the Japanese term for the new Princesses of Heart), but at this point, she might turn to the dark side--it's a real toss up. Well, I'm glad they didn't just automatically decide Elsa is the goodest guy. Then she knocks Sora and Pals down the mountain in a giant avalanche.
After all the drama, Sora sees a talking snowman, and we're like, "Awww, man." We were kind hoping that after all the time we'd already spent wandering through Arendelle (we already had half the hidden Mickeys!), we wouldn't have to deal with any of the other characters that we're so unfond of. Olaf actually isn't that bad, but after seeing Emma and the Beast, we kind of really despise Josh Gad. He's not in the Japanese version, but it's kind of hard not to think of him. Also I hate Olaf's stupid snow tooth. Why isn't it made of ice?
We were hoping maybe it would just be Olaf, but since one of the main themes of that movie is supposedly the love between the two sisters, we weren't surprised to see Anna, Kristoff, and Sven join the party. They all introduced themselves, and when Sora found out that Anna was Elsa's sister, he asked her to tell him what all was going on. For some reason, Kristoff took the rest of the party away so Anna and Sora could talk in private. I didn't understand this until it was too late.
Anna was like, "Flashback!" and we were like, "Oh no." and the game was like, "Aaand back to the present!" and we were like, "Wheeeeeww." and the game was like, "Vamp!" and we were like, "Noooooooo!!!"
That's right, they inserted the snowman song. Fortunately, this one was covered up by narration, and they didn't do the whole thing. But then in the middle of the narration w/song, they cut back to the present, and Anna just randomly sings the last part of the song, which is addressed to Elsa, and would probably make no sense to anybody who was trying to listen to the story, and we would be like, "Uuuuuugh, I was trying to get information! Why are you SINGING!?" I mean, I love singing as much as the next person, but there is a time and a place and this song had no narrative value (by which I mean, the song itself wasn't a narration, at least not at that part, so it was utterly unhelpful).
And while we were still getting over the shock and annoyance and hatred from all that, Kristoff came back and was all, "Some weird monsters showed up and now Olaf's in pieces." So we had to search for the pieces so we could put him back together. And whenever we tried to wander out of the area where his pieces were, Goofy would be all, "Don't you care about Olaf?" and we would be like, "NO!!!" There was some ranting about how Sora is a much kinder, more loving person than we are, because at this point we just hated everything, and Sora was all, "Aww, you care about your sister!" I had to admit that if I only had the information Sora had to go on, I might think the same thing. But I've seen the movie, so I don't.
And to make matters worse, until you found Olaf's head, he kept whining at you! ...I mean, Olaf's not exactly a whiner, so it was more like chattering, but it was extremely ugh. Meanwhile, Anna and Kristoff are all, "I know he's a magic snowman, but I'm worried!" and "We have to put him back together!" and "We'll help!" as they proceeded to stand rooted to their spots and help not at all.
And then! they don't even let you just put the stupid snowman back together. They keep giving you different clumps of snow for the middle part, and you have to keep trying to put him back together and failing and looking for the torso again! It was kind of infuriating.
At that point we were like, "I can't take it anymore. As soon as this stupid snowman is whole again, we're getting out of here and going to Thebes." (Thebes is in Olympus.) So that's what we did. And we found three hidden Mickeys, two golden Hercules action figures (there's some kid in town who collects the action figures, and he's like, "I have all of them but the gold one! Can you find the gold one for me? I need five!" and I'm like, "I thought you only needed one to complete your collection, but okay"), and a Cherry King minigame Heartless (it's one of the Seven Purins), and it was very worthwhile.
We still have to go back and finish Arendelle. On the bright side, the world itself is very beautiful, especially now that the sun is up. Now if only we didn't have to deal with those aggravating characters...
Today I'm thankful for making good progress on Sailor Moon, having time to exercise, Page hanging out with us while we played Kingdom Hearts, getting some spectacular views of Olympus, and finding the Cherry King. And getting to sleep in tomorrow.